It seems like just yesterday that i was walking up to the front entrance door of Ocean City Elementary School. I can recall being quite nervous and anxious to find out if my first day of tutoring was going to be similar to what i had envisioned in my mind. I have to say that this experience has taught me more than i thought possible and has placed a great amount of impact on my teacher identity. I have realized that in almost every lesson plan there are students that will completely understand while others have no clue as how to tackle the assignment. Just because it may seem that the class understands the assignment does not neccessarily mean that there is not a student out there who isnt struggling. I want to be the teacher who reaches all students and makes sure that i have tought the lesson so thouroughly and percisely so that no child feels left behind. I remember sitting behind my desk as a grade schooler while the teacher went further on in a lesson that i had been confused on from the start. I wasnt the type of child who would make it a point to speak out and announce that i was having a problem so I therefore would become more and more confused as the lesson went on. Although it may appear that the classroom understands the teacher that is often not the case. As I spent time observing the teacher and walking up and down the aisles I noticed that many students seemed lost, which would then lead to disengagement and a lack of attention. Observing this happen has made me realize that as a teacher i need to be extra attentive towards all students and make sure that everyone is on the same page before i move on.
Being involved in a public providence school has exposed me to students of many different cultures. Just because my background is different than my students does not mean that i cannot understand them and their upbringing. The FNED course and the turtoring has worked together to bring me to the realization that although racism has quited down it still exists in many places including the classroom. At first I didnt realize how i could possibly exclude a minority student unless i purposely made a racist remark or intentionally excluded them. However, i have come to realize that minorities are excluded in the curriculum, in the English language, through teaching styles, the manner in which the teacher speaks, and so on. Now that i am aware of this i can make a deliberate effort to avoid this type of exclusion and make sure that not one student feels like he/she is not a part of the classroom. Theorist Allen Johnson wrote an article titled, "Whos Me?What it means to be involved in Priviledge and Oppression". This article focuses on how certain groups of people for example, whites whose main language is english have priviledges over other groups of people who for example may not have the main language of Enlgish. If spanish speaking people are in a society where English is used then they automatically have a setback towards other people. This article has made me think twice before i label a student as lazy and has encouraged me to instead recognize the cultural barriers that may be delaying this childs learning. While some students may catch on really quickly it may be due to their priviledges and not that they are smarter than some other students in the room.
I've also learned that from the first day I start officially teaching that I must present myself in a manner that doesn't necessarily intimidate the students but that let's them know who is in control. When I first started turtoring I worked with my children on a one on one basis, which allowed me to get to know the child and have an idea of their reading levels. Once I started doing partner activities I realized that I had lost a sense of authority since they no longer listened to what i was instructing them to do. After several failed attempts of trying to get them under control while still being extremely friendly I realized that if I wanted to improve their reading skills then I would have to be stricter and let them know that I was not joking around with them. If I had trouble controlling two kids I wonder how much difficulty I would have with controlling an entire classroom. I think my mistake in this situation was that the students first impression of me was that I was more of a friend to them and lacked any kind of authority. Once a child has made their initial judgement on someone it is hard to change it and hard to win over control once you have been marked as a friend or overly nice. Therefore, I now know that from the second I start teaching I must give off a strong impression of authority so that the students do not end up calling the shots.
This expereince has guided me on the path to deciding what kind of teacher I want to be. I want to be a teacher that challenges the status quo by incorporating different teaching styles into the daily lesson plans. Instead of just having my students take notes I want them to be able to participate and do activities that helps them learn the material. I want my students to have open discussions and learn from one another through intelligent conversations. I believe theorist Ira Shor would agree with this since he strongly supports a type of learning that occurs through participation. Shor and I both agree that the classroom is a place where learning should be enjoyed instead of forced upon. Instead of having students memorize endless facts for the sole purpose of a test a teacher should have the students learn the material through activities and explain its significant value and thats its not just important to know for the exam. Connections should be made so that students can relate their knowledge to the outside world and to various subjects.I know that I am just beginning my journey to becoming a teacher but I feel that I have gained so much knowledge from this tutoring experience and that it has already significantly impacted my vision of the type of teacher i want to be.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Prompt #4 (Question #4)
Every student walks into the classrooom with a history that has preprogramed different kinds of biases into their minds regarding race, sexuality, and what defines "normal" and "acceptable". My personal history has influenced many biases and false beliefs that I had as a child and as an early teen. I grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood with no friends or classmates of color. I went to small catholic schools all my life with little discussion regarding homosexuality or racism. Not to say that my family was racist but they would quite frequently make remarks that enforce the bias of all african americans being criminals or "no good". Although I never agreed with that bias it was still engraved in my mind that people of color were mainly associated with crime and violence due to the medias portrayal and my families remarks. As I grew older I became surrounded by poeple of different races and made a group of friends that were mainly of hispanic or african descent. It was by the interaction with people of different cultures that worked to diminish my biases and open my eyes to the reality that we should be accepting of all groups of people and that one group is not more important than another.
As a teacher I would have to work towards helping my students biases diminish just like mine did. I would do this by not letting rude comments regarding race, sexual preference, or gender go ignored. If i were to hear a student use a nasty name I would call the student aside and ask why he chose that particular word and then describe why it is not appropriate and how the word came to be. I would also expose my students to people of different cultures and beliefs so that they are accustomed to ways of life outiside of their own. I would strongly encourage that my school invite guest speakers to come and talk to the students about growing up as a homosexual or as an african american and how the biases applied to their situation have effected their lives. I think the more students are exposed to difference then the more likely they are to be accepting of others as they grow older. We as teachers need to provide students with the tools to go out into the real world and be able to realize that the stereotypes that surrounds them are false and based off of ignorance and misunderstandings.
My personal history of growing up as a white female in a white neighborhood may intersect with some of my students who live in predominately black neighborhoods or communities whose primary language is not english. Although my students and I will have many differences it is important to not let those differences become barriers to understanding eachother and the needs they have as students. However, some challenges may arise such as if there are a large group of english language learners in my classroom and i would be unable to explain directions to them in spanish or any other language they may speak if need be. In this case I would need to make accomodations such as providing a translator or arranging special times for them to see me for extra help. An advantage would be that I understand why these biases exist and do not blame the students for having them since it is not their fault but the society as a whole who is responsible for creating them. I would use this knowledge to make my classroom as accepting as possible through teaching techniques that do not put minorities at a disadvantage and through explaining to my students the hurtfulness of stereotyping and the damage it does on certain people.
I am so thankful for this tutoring experience because it truly did prove me wrong about several misconceptions i held towards children of public schools. Since I have always been somewhat sheltered in a catholic all girl school for five years and in other catholic schools for my earlier education i have always had a bias towards public school kids. I always viewed them as out of control, rebellious, and disrepectful towards teachers. However, this experience made me realize that public school students are just as curtious as the classmates that i grew up with. This misconception was destryoed within five minutes after wallking into the school and having little third graders go out of their way to open the doors for me. This just goes to show that if people are not exposed to certain things then they conjure up an image that is incorrect but could be easily fixed if exposure occurs before the person becomes too stuborn to change their thoughts. Providing my students with course material that includeS all groups of people and by exposing them to different cultures and ways of life will be a huge step towards correcting biases and forming a classroom that accepts everyone.
As a teacher I would have to work towards helping my students biases diminish just like mine did. I would do this by not letting rude comments regarding race, sexual preference, or gender go ignored. If i were to hear a student use a nasty name I would call the student aside and ask why he chose that particular word and then describe why it is not appropriate and how the word came to be. I would also expose my students to people of different cultures and beliefs so that they are accustomed to ways of life outiside of their own. I would strongly encourage that my school invite guest speakers to come and talk to the students about growing up as a homosexual or as an african american and how the biases applied to their situation have effected their lives. I think the more students are exposed to difference then the more likely they are to be accepting of others as they grow older. We as teachers need to provide students with the tools to go out into the real world and be able to realize that the stereotypes that surrounds them are false and based off of ignorance and misunderstandings.
My personal history of growing up as a white female in a white neighborhood may intersect with some of my students who live in predominately black neighborhoods or communities whose primary language is not english. Although my students and I will have many differences it is important to not let those differences become barriers to understanding eachother and the needs they have as students. However, some challenges may arise such as if there are a large group of english language learners in my classroom and i would be unable to explain directions to them in spanish or any other language they may speak if need be. In this case I would need to make accomodations such as providing a translator or arranging special times for them to see me for extra help. An advantage would be that I understand why these biases exist and do not blame the students for having them since it is not their fault but the society as a whole who is responsible for creating them. I would use this knowledge to make my classroom as accepting as possible through teaching techniques that do not put minorities at a disadvantage and through explaining to my students the hurtfulness of stereotyping and the damage it does on certain people.
I am so thankful for this tutoring experience because it truly did prove me wrong about several misconceptions i held towards children of public schools. Since I have always been somewhat sheltered in a catholic all girl school for five years and in other catholic schools for my earlier education i have always had a bias towards public school kids. I always viewed them as out of control, rebellious, and disrepectful towards teachers. However, this experience made me realize that public school students are just as curtious as the classmates that i grew up with. This misconception was destryoed within five minutes after wallking into the school and having little third graders go out of their way to open the doors for me. This just goes to show that if people are not exposed to certain things then they conjure up an image that is incorrect but could be easily fixed if exposure occurs before the person becomes too stuborn to change their thoughts. Providing my students with course material that includeS all groups of people and by exposing them to different cultures and ways of life will be a huge step towards correcting biases and forming a classroom that accepts everyone.
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